My Thoughts While Watching… The Craft (1996) [Trigger Warning: Mentions of Self-Harm, Suicide, & Rape]

I’ve seen plenty of Buzzfeed posts floating around where people write a list of thoughts while watching a movie. I read one years ago where someone watched all of the Harry Potter movies for the first time while live tweeting and writing a post per movie. I still quote a lot of what he said to this day. #Wood4Wood.

Anyway, I have taken inspiration and have decided to try it for myself. Of course they will be horror movies and possibly TV shows. They don’t have to be first time watches. It just gives me something productive to do while watching TV.

I will number everything to kind of break it up and there will be SPOILERS. Here we go…

WARNING: the movie covers topics of rape, self-harm and mentions of suicide. There will be a couple of screenshots, but nothing too graphic. If you’re not in the right headspace for these topics or are triggered by them then I recommend giving this post a miss.

It’s been a couple of years. And it’s next on Netflix search. I’m not ever not up for watching The Craft.
I was 9 when this movie came out, but when I was 12-13 years old I used to watch it ALOT. It made me interested in Wicca, along with Practical Magic. I still have my spellbooks somewhere. I really need to try and dig them out sometime.
Remembered the subtitles from the get-go. Well done me!
I taped this off Sky Movies and that’s how I used to watch it. I missed out the first minute or so so it was a long time before I saw the brief before credits scene with the other three gals.
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This music is so mid-90s. I love that.
This movie came out not long after Empire Records, so Robin Tunney had to wear a wig here because she began filming this a month after she finished filming that.
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What are peg and groove floors? I’ve never heard of such a thing. I’m pretty sure this is the only line we get from Sarah’s stepmum, whose name has already escaped me. I think it’s Jenny?
I’ve always wondered about that photo of her Mum. Was she a model for Sears or something?
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I hate it when random homeless men with snakes wander into my new house and tell me to relax like I’m insane for getting upset that he just let himself in.
Do you think they learned from Cannibal Holocaust and Friday the 13th about people not liking it when you kill snakes in front of them? See, kiddies, you can choose to cut to black instead of showing a real animal death.
Teen girl hates her stepmother cliche.
Haha, goth girl is Satan. Hilarious, Breckin. You know what’s funnier than that? You’re future as live-action Jon Arbuckle in the movie even Bill Murray hates. Now that’s hilarious. Rat Race was pretty funny, too. But that wasn’t because of you.
Billy Loomis looks weirdly taller in this movie. He also looks cleaner without the greasy, floppy hair that was so popular at the time. It will be infamously worn by Luke Wilson in the sequel.
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Not going to close your locker there, Nance? What if someone else tries to use your edgy noose?
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Haha, Breckin is a dumbass. Quelle surprise.
Oh, you did not get laid you loser.
Snail trail? Isn’t that the line of hair that goes down from a man’s belly button? What a weird thing to call someone. Especially a complete stranger.
We get it, you’re a douche. Let’s move on.
Well, if it walks like a duck and quacks like a duck, it’s an asshole.
The nickname “Bitches of Eastwick” has never sat right with me. Even when I was younger. It’s not funny, clever, or nice.
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Did he just call Nancy a major slut? He really is a duck.
I love the way she deadpan says a lot of her lines. She did this in Empire Records, too, and I love her for it.
Hey, wanna come watch me play football? Yah, sure. Why not. Actually, why would you?
Cue The Smiths. Actually it’s a cover. This was before Charmed, which was nowhere near as good as this movie. This is what Charmed wanted to be when it grew up. It even used the same cover song. An inferior ripoff.
His last name is Hooker? Both a noun and a verb.
I don’t even know him, I just wanted to watch him run around with the other boys.
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Apologise, Nancy. Don’t just have your friend do it on your behalf.
Why do people say “yeah we/I know who you are” like that’s not at all creepy. Please stop saying this, Hollywood. It. Is. Creepy.
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Don’t worry, Bonnie. He’ll be your boyfriend next. Wink.
Sure, wander off with the strange girls that everyone is afraid of. Nothing bad could possibly happen.
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The right way? You mean up the wrist instead of across? This is two movies in a row for Robin where her character slits her wrist.
Yeah, Bonnie, how do you know the right way to slit your wrists? I think this may warrant a conversation with someone.
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Why does this woman keep letting these girls into her shop when she knows they steal. Is she just waiting for Karma to eventually catch up with them?
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Here, steal this book. It’s what the animals would do in nature.
“It was your mother’s”. I love how Sarah doesn’t even ask how she knows this, like she’s not impressed, even though the woman seems kind of smug about saying that previous sentence.
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“Are you going to pay for those?”. You mean those book. She didn’t pick anything else up. “Actually I was just going to put in my bag and leave, so no”.
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She feels so guilty that her new BFFs are always stealing from this shop that she decides to pity buy some candles.
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“You know how to use candles?” My brain seems to be struggling to process this ridiculous dialogue. You can see from Sarah’s reaction that she knows how I feel right now.
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When Bonnie asked Sarah if she was going to go shopping with them at the school, she said she didn’t have any money, which they responded with “we get a five fingered discount”. Then all of a sudden she has $20 to spend on two magic books and three gothic dinner candles. Magic, I guess?
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I don’t know if that priest insert was supposed to be a joke or… It was very out of place.
Damn, that guy’s head was squished under that car, but there’s no gore or sign of head squishage when you see his body come to a stop in the middle of the road.
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A guy was staggering across a busy road and they all thought he was going to get hit by a car, so they must have made it happen? I knew he was going to get hit by a car, does that make a witch, too? Can I be the fifth corner? I’ll bring someone else in and we can make it a cube. I don’t know how many corners a cube has but I’m sure I can meet that quota once I find out.
These are some Twilight Zone scenarios, Sarah. Like when Burgess Meredith finally has peace and quiet to read all of the books and his glasses fall off and break. I believe it’s called Sod’s law.
Nancy talking about this deity, Manon, being inside of her sounds like that scene from Rosemary’s Baby to me.
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She’s scared. I don’t blame her, freak.
So she got her own school uniform now. Adorable. That’ll make getting dressed in the morning a bit easier. Speaking from experience.
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He’s not good with being told no is he? Foreshadowing. I hope this doesn’t turn him into a masked serial killer. We all know what happens to Billy when he doesn’t get his nut off.
I’ll admit, my friend and I used to quote that whole “she’s gonna cry, then I’m gonna cry, then we’re all gonna cry” line a lot. Still kind of humorous.
Teenage boys really suck.
You’re making it very difficult for me to enjoy Dodgeball and Zoolander. And I am not okay with that. Dammit Christine!
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Why is it funny that this bitch literally just admitted to being openly racist? I don’t get the joke. When I was younger I didn’t realise that that’s what this was about.
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Oh, it’s Mary Alice Young. She just keeps popping up in random things. First Starship Troopers, then Gilmore Girls, and now this.
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We never find out how she got those scars. Or how repeatedly stabbing them with a needle will make them go away. The only thing that’ll make those go away is magic. Wink.
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I think this is where my apprehension about getting a tattoo comes from. And I would really like a few of those.
White trash trailer park family life. Is she going to grow up to be Mikey My-My? So Rob wasn’t just remaking Halloween…
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I don’t get that joke, either. The nun just asked you to stop talking in class.
I need to check Spotify for the soundtrack.
When your new friends hold a dagger to your throat in the middle of the woods, then force you to drink your own (and their) blood.
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Nancy’s a bit of a psycho, and one of Rochelle’s only friends. Why isn’t she threatening Laura to leave her alone? That’s what good friends do, they protect their friends from disgusting people.
You can’t get the complete soundtrack, but some of it is on Spotify.
So does having scars all over your back prevent you from washing your hair? Because that’s the only gross thing about Bonnie. Everything else is fine. Just a quick shampoo/conditioner.
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So magic will turn an asshole into a crazed stalker. Why does she even want to cast a love spell on this chucklefuck? Respect yourself, girl. He told everyone that you were bad in bed because you turned him down. Find yourself a nice, respectful wizard. Try Hogwarts, they’re all British there.
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Okay this scene is actually pretty hysterical. His friends are making fun of him and making Stepford references and he’s just sitting there all “duuuuuuhhhh” like there’s some mind control at play. And when she tells him to pay attention to the priest…
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This reminds me, I haven’t finished Bewitched. I’m still on season 3 and I left it a couple of years ago. I don’t think I need to rewatch, each episode seems pretty self-contained.
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See, Sarah’s only known Rochelle a short time and she’s already taken action against Laura. Such an awesome gal pal.
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“They have shampoo for that, you know”. I still love that line.
Yeah, put a lid on it, Laura. Stupid bitch.
This is what happens when you bleach too much. Or in my case bleach after two colour removal treatments. I was fully prepared to be bald. Luckily it just broke in half.
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It’s like peeling off dry glue and it looks oddly satisfying.
Now that her scars have peeled off has that made her more confident, because they weren’t visible so it made no difference to her physically?
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That’s dude’s gross.
Apparently in 1996 you could stretch $175,000 quite far.
Casually joking about shooting your mother with an imaginary shotgun cause she’s embarrassed by her.
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Aw her mum clearly doesn’t have any friends.
A furnished apartment for $175,000. I’m not sure the writers thought it through, but then I haven’t done the research.
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I used to do this with my friend. We would lie and say it worked even though you couldn’t see it in the mirror.
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Oh, dear. That duck’s outside your window in the middle of the night screaming your name.
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That line delivery of “nobody can help me” is pretty funny.
I’m not sure how much of this dialogue is supposed to be funny, but I think Shyamalan saw this and got inspired to make The Happening.
Don’t tell Nancy about the snakes and bugs you used to hallucinate. She may use it against you later.
Is May Eve the last day of April?
She needs to stop screaming about a man being inside of her.
Why are you surprised at her behaviour? She’s always been a psycho. Now she has magical powers.
I think he’s probably watching you, Sarah. That’s how he knows what you look like right now. It’s like he’s stalking you. Or he’s Ghostface. Either way, yikes.
Remember how badly he took her rejection before the love spell turned him into a psychotic stalker? That hasn’t gotten better.
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Okay, here’s how I see it. Nancy’s friend (who I’m guessing she’s known for a while) is consistently racially bullied at school and she does nothing. Suddenly, Nancy’s new white friend is almost raped because of a magic spell and she not only goes charging to a party to fuck with him, she kills him. Damn, watching this at 35 is different than watching it at 13.
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Where did he get that hat? He didn’t have that earlier and this is just after. And why isn’t it three times bigger than his head?
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Nancy doesn’t take rejection well, either. It’s like she becomes a totally different person. Like it’s not even her anymore.
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I’m bald now, maybe I should be nice to the Black girl… And I’m going to look uncomfortable as I do it.
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I used to think she said he treated women like horses. She did not.
She actually thought that underneath all the bravado and treating girls like fuck toys, he was a good guy? Oh, Sarah. Oh, Honey.
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That’s a lot of ribbon.
Casual murder threats. I warned you about wandering off with these strange girls that everyone is afraid of.
When you’re being chased by witches, I guess running through junkie alley is like walking through Care Bear lane.
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Did Nancy really just run out of the bathroom like she’s hurrying to set up a prank or something? Very Ghostface.
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How is you levitating a surprise? A cake is a surprise. This isn’t.
So for the other two it’s basically peer pressure. They’re just following Nancy cause she’s nuts and dangerous.
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Now she’s all alone. She just let them leave. You would think she’d put up more of an aggressive fight to get them to stay.
“I called him first”. He’s my daddy, not yours! He loves me more than you!
Wait, Breckin’s name was Mitt? O…kay?

This movie still really holds up, although watching it as an adult vs. watching it as a teenager are two completely different experiences. There are some good effects, like Sarah materialising into her clothes through the floor, and some not so good, like Nancy walking on water. It’s still one of those movies that feels relevant for teenage girls, whether they practice the dark arts or not. Dealing with boys, peer pressure, bullies, your best friends turning on you, and fitting into a new school, are some of the things we can all relate to at that age. This is appealing without preaching about feminism or basically pandering to a young female audience. It’s about four teenage girls who have their own individual personalities and traumas, going through something bigger than they will ever comprehend or even attempt to control. The soundtrack is also awesome.

My Thoughts While Watching… The Craft (1996) [Trigger Warning: Mentions of Self-Harm, Suicide, & Rape]

Published by LinseyLovesHorror

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